I got up today like any other day. I drove back to Johnson
Memorial Hospital, parked in the back and walk in to the emergency department
like I have for the last 4 weeks. I surveyed the list of patients currently
there and the various ailments. Thankfully, my preceptor was in a light hearted,
joyful mood, as was I. We went through the normal dance. Hi I'm Janie, the
medical student. I'm with you today. A few minutes later he asks what I'm going
into. "Are you a fourth year? Oh, so you've matched! Where'd you end up?
Congratulations!" "Actually," I reply, "today is my last
day, of my last rotation."
When I got in my car to drive away from that hospital for
the last time, it started to hit me. The Mandisa's song 'Overcomer' came on.
How appropriate, I thought. Today I HAVE overcome. . . Wait, no. I overcame 4
years ago, today I'm enjoying the fruit of it. You see I didn't want to go to
medical school. I knew there was no way I could do that. Just getting into med
school seemed like an impossible mountain to climb, not to mention actually
finishing! It came down to a decision of whether or not to obey God. Do I step
out in faith and apply, or do I say no, and run away in fear to do something
easier. Well, thankfully, God gave me the grace to obey. That decision right there, that's when I
overcame! That's when I secured the victory in Christ! I don't think it's
always about the end product. Sometimes it's about choosing to believe God no
matter what!
I remember distinctly coming to the conclusion that even if
God didn't want me to get into medical school, or even finish medical school,
that obeying Him was more important. He would work out the other details. My
motto for med school that day became, "He is worth it. He is enough."
That phrase sits above my bed to this day. I woke up under that phase this
morning, and it has remained true. He was worth it all! All the hours sitting
in class, plus the hours of studying at home. The time away from family and
friends. The stress, the exams, the feelings of inadequacy; He not only gave me
the strength and joy to keep going, but He taught me more of Himself, and drew
me closer to Him through it all! That in itself is enough. To know Him. Yet,
today here I am, all boxes checked. Ready to walk across that stage to more
responsibility than I can fathom at the moment. There's a lot more to come, but
for the moment, this moment, it is finished. And I can rest, because the God
who this day brought to completion what I thought was the impossible in me, He
is faithful to go with me, behind me, and before me. He is STILL worth it, and
He will STILL be enough!
