A test of faith

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I believe part of why God works in our life is so that He can use what we learn and struggle with to help and encourage others. Therefore in this blog I will try to be open and honest about my imperfections and struggles.

Tomorrow morning I will take my 7th medical school exam. Thus far I have been below average on all of them. Ok not too bad I realize these are medical students! On two exams thus far I have barely passed, and yet haven’t been too stressed because I know God wants me here and that success is in obedience not outcome. Today however, I found out I failed my first test ever! Like not even D+ failed it! The bad thing is that I studied so hard. I really thought I knew it! I thought things were going to improve but they only got worse. I wanted to melt and throw a fit and ask God why He would bring me here to fail. And then I remembered what I wrote for my facebook status this morning: “Faith must be tested, because it can only become your intimate possession through conflict . . . Faith is absolute trust in God- trust that could never imagine that He would forsake us" Oswald Chambers in My Utmost for His Highest.

Faith, oh ye of little faith! Tomorrow I have my final for pathology. The first exam we took I made a 74% and it is half of my grade. I need a 70% to pass. Staring into this seemingly overwhelming situation, I have so much peace! If I fail, I have not failed. I have obeyed God in coming, and I have grown to know Him in a way words cannot explain. Yet, I do not think it is His will that I drop out of medical school. Somehow I think He will pull me through it. Probably because it is so incredibly obvious that I cannot do it alone! Let it be known, if I make it through this test, it was God alone; His grace, His wisdom, His way!

So for now I have to get back to studying, but please pray with me that He will give me understanding, the He will clear my mind and help me focus, and that no matter what the outcome that He would be glorified!

Comments

  1. AaronAugust 29, 2012 at 6:06 PM

    We will be praying in faith. Keep us updated. He created the kreb cycle...he knows all this stuff. Do your part by studying and trust Him. Like you said if you fail you do not fail.He will enable you!
    Aaron and sonya

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