"We are the clay and You our potter" Isa 64:8

“Struck down, but not destroyed” 2 Corinthians 4:6 has taken on a whole new meaning for me. I am all of two weeks away from surviving my first block of medical school, yet after today it seems impossible even to survive! For the last month and a half, I have been tested literally and figuratively in more ways and more often that I even thought possible! I have failed many of those tests, yet until now have felt the overwhelming presence of God. I clung to Him like never before and worshiped in the midst of what seemed like my world crashing in on me. This weekend I had a chance to go home. I actually got somewhat caught up on sleep and had fun for once in a really long time. And then I had to come back. Today I very possible failed yet another rather important test. I can feel myself cracking, as though I am about to explode all over whatever is around. I do not want to be here. I do not want to study anymore. I’m tired of trying so hard and failing. Tired of always being tired ...

My first few weeks of medical school were difficult to say the least. Still processing my trip to East Africa and moving to different state took much more of a toll on me than I ever expected! For the first 2 or 3 weeks I could barely focus on my school work and that doesn’t bring about great results in med school! I was just barely passing every exam until I flat out failed my first exam. Microbiology. I would like to say that I got my act together, pulled my self up by my bootstraps and that was the end of that. But that was not the case. Slowly I began coming out of this ‘funk.’ I was able to study and understand more rather than memorize random facts, put them together and apply them. Through all of this God has given me so much peace about life in general. I am honestly beginning to love Him more than ever before! Just this last week, I had my second microbiology test. Obviously I needed to do extremely well on it. The weekend before I had already gone over ev...